I will not judge you, however, if you generously spread this delicious filling upon white bread with its crusts trimmed away. There be no disparaging remarks about the complete lack of nutritional virtue in that bread, for this is the one time it has a place. Now let us begin quickly, lest I slip into rhyming verse recounting my sweet memories of summer lunches in the Orchid Room on Louisville's Fourth Street of yesteryear.
Our ingredients are only three: cream cheese, onion, and cucumber.
I have used an English cucumber here but a garden cucumber lends more flavor and is recommended. Vidalia onion in my opinion is the ONLY onion suitable. That means you will be confined to making this in summer, which is only appropriate anyway.
Give the cream cheese about a minute on half power in the microwave if it is not already at room temp when you start.
We are only going to use the juice of the two vegetables in keeping with the authenticity of our dish. The quickest way to get the amount needed is by grating to a fine shred over a bowl. Please disregard the terribly gaudy orange nail polish. It was too dark in the den when I was painting those nails to see how bad they looked.
There should be more than enough juice from just the one cucumber. Leaving the peel intact results in a rich green juice that will naturally (and only slightly) tint the cream cheese.
Press to extract all the juice and discard the pulp.
Now, for the onion. If you've gone willy-nilly into the produce department and grabbed any old onion, prepare to cry. The elegant Vidalia, however, will allow you to retain your dignity as it invokes no tears. And yet gives forth the abundance of juice you now seek.
|3 Tablespoons of Cucumber Juice, 1 Tablespoon Onion Juice|
And add the softened cream cheese, whisking all together.
|Add salt and pepper to taste. No other seasonings are needed.|
|And yet, you may gild the lily a bit with some fresh dill and chives|
if you choose.
Finally, the taste test: A finger dollop will do, or a slice of cucumbre, or a dainty triangle of white bread. Whichever you choose, do enjoy with a sip of sweet iced tea.
THE SHOPPING LIST
1 Large Cucumber
8 oz Cream Cheese
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The Cultural Dish: Pasta With Roasted Shrimp and Cucumbers
Delicious Lean: Cucumber Jicama Salad
Napa Farmhouse 1885: Cucumber and Avocado Open-Face Sandwiches
And Love It, Too: Fermented Spicy Garlic-Dill Cukes and Zukes
FN Dish: No-Cook Cucumber Recipes
Cooking With Elise: Wedge Salad With Cucumber-Ranch Dressing
The Sensitive Epicure: Chinese Style Cucumbers